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Fantasm
April 2004
Friday Afternoon
Friday I took off work so I could participate in several official events. The last few years of Fantasm I’ve been a judge at the Iron Bartender, often to my chagrin and the audience’s delight. This year The Reverend decided not to organize the thing (too expensive, and he was tired of losing) so he helped organize a Celebrity Roast – of himself. I got all done up in my tux and opened with a few nervous zingers (I’m better behind a crowd than in front) and giggled along as his other friends and acquaintances tore him a new one. His rebuttal was spirited, but it was seven against one so he didn’t stand much of a chance.
Award for Most Absurd Shoes goes to this pair of portable trampolines.
The first ever Mr. Fantasm pageant took place somewhere in there. I don’t
understand why it wasn’t run back-to-back with Ms. Fantasm, but it did provide
some early afternoon entertainment. Fortunately for you, few of my photos turned
out worth a damn. Suffice it to say, the rumors about what some men don’t wear
under their kilts were confirmed. Also worth mentioning – you don’t have to be
male to compete in Mr. Fantasm, though it does help if you have a penis. It
doesn’t have to be yours, just bring one along…
The hypnotist Fonteneau did some pretty amazing things with random members of
the audience, most of it of an adult and sexual nature. The man puts on a heck
of a show and I highly recommend seeing him if you get a chance. I got an email
from him a couple of days later:
"My current website (http://geocities.com/fun2hypno) was judged the lamest site in america by my friends, family, and fans. My new site (http://www.fun2hypno.com) is currently in disarray and should be up fully in a short time. It will have a seperate "adult" area."
An event I’m regularly called on to aid is the Ms. Fantasm pageant. After years of heckling such events from the back row I’m a favorite target for those who need a “volunteer.” This year one of the contestants needed a sucker so I got pulled on stage to be the body in “Southern body shots,” a ritual involving potato salad and fried chicken. I wouldn’t complain if I hadn’t had to wash the potato salad out of the new outfit I had put on only moments before.
I was drafted again moments after walking back into the room, this time to wield a riding crop as a contestant needed someone to burst her bubble. Her bubble wrap costume, that is. |
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A few of the other contestants for Ms. Fantasm.
The girl in the leather strappy thing won for her pony imitation.
Out in the con suite the body painting and photography continued non-stop. I like this photo because it looks like some kind of crime scene investigation. |
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